Behind my smile and bubbly personality, I hide a secret that I don’t share. I have social anxiety. I can speak to a crowd with ease. Its like I’m performing for a show, but when I have to talk to a person. My hand begins to tremble, my heart beats 2,000 beats a minute, and I feel like there are a million eyes on me. When I speak to the person, my words cannot form, and I end up saying something outrageous or stupid. My mind begins to overload with a million things to say, but I cannot speak out loud.
I do not have any friends because I am scared that I will run them off because of my awkwardness. I honestly would not know how to be a friend cause I’ve never had one. I am scared of people, but I have dreams. I have visions of being successful, but I know I need people by my side to make it happen. I have hopes of having a family, but I can’t even walk up to a person to “shoot my shot.”
I am tired of being a loner, but I am scared to step out. I am afraid of forming relationships. I am tired of being scared.